Here's something I'd forgotten about until I was browsing through our digital pictures tonight. I bought a new LAN cable tester a few months ago because I misplaced it (I left it somewhere. If you recognize this, and have been wondering what it is, and where it came from, its mine, please call me and I'll come get it!) and can't do any basic networking troubleshooting without it. I opened it, and discarded the package in the normal matter (it sat on the computer desk for a couple days till Jenn found it). She was laughing at the instructions on the back. I'd never read them. As with most directions, I figured they'd be there if I find myself hopelessly lost and needed them. When she showed them to me I had to scan them knowing someone out there would get a laugh. So, here it is:

Rule #1. Forbid to use for cable with electric current. OK, that kind of makes sense. I could see the problem with using this on a live wire. You could damage the tool, shock yourself, or cause a short circuit that would melt the insulation off possibly singing the cat, or carpet. Fair enough.

Rule #2. Do not use it beyond usage. Well, this is where I started to wonder if maybe their translator had been hitting the saki a little bit on his lunch break. So I thought about it a bit, and figured what they were trying to say was not to use it for anything other than what it was meant for. Well, that works for an explanation, except, they really don't ever tell you what the usage is. So how are you supposed to know what is beyond the usage? I really don't know. Just make sure you don't cross that line, got it mister??

Rule #3. Do not change it on your mind. I have no idea what this means... I'm at a total loss... Do not change it on your mind. It doesn't say what will happen if you do decide to throw caution to the wind and change it on your mind, just don't do it. Lives are probably at stake here folks, this is no time to be messing around, don't change it on your mind. Never, ever, change it on your mind!!

After reading the safety precautions, I was curious to read the "using methods".

• It is specially designed for testing electric circuit... My guess is, they had someone in the mail room down at the sweatshop whose brother walked the dog of the english teacher's cousin do their translating for them. Or they just completely disregarded rule #1, probably rule #2 and #3 also, if we knew what they were all about.
• Push power switch at first, and then the power will light up after setting up an electric circuit... OK, so, should I push the power switch first? Or do I do it after I set up and electric circuit. I'm really starting to remember why I don't read directions at this point. Note again, the total disregard for rule #1, and I'm pretty sure #3 at this point.
• To be sure the cable it without electric current. Then link the sender and receiver... Linking the sender and receiver is what completes the circuit talked about in the last step, should I have turned the power on yet, doesn't turning the power on put current in the cable?? I'm scared....
• It is special cable tester. Don't connect it with computer. HUB& other machine.... Does this mean "special" as in brownies? Or does it mean "special" as in Olympics? Either way, it sure does explain volumes about the directions. I don't think there were any safety rules violated in this step. Unless someone was trying to stir brownie batter with the tester, in which case I think rule #2 would have been broken, and possibly #3.

Just remember, whatever you do, do not change it on your mind.